So I finally found an outlet to talk about all the feelings that I wear on my sleeve … a blog. Sounds kind of like something that belongs in a swamp. So as you can tell I’m not what they call a blogger – but I intend to learn and who knows maybe I will even her good at it. I know I want to start writing down my days because I feel like time is going by faster and faster the older I get . Especially since I have had to start over .
And start over again.
I want this blog to
be real and healing. I want to write it out so maybe I can forget it and move on or maybe so I can remember it and never forget. I’m not sure yet so we will just go with it and see. There are things I am sure of and I things I still question . I do know that I married the love of my life with no hesitations on June 13th 1998. We were crazy happy and I was so excited about our future together. We were always on the same page. He loved wrestling newsletters, pizza on Friday nights, and laughing… I loved him. We dreamed together and talked about our day and even though we only worked less then a mile from our house in Paintsvile KY and worked less then a mile apart we still
probably talked 10 times a day. Young love. The beautiful Paintsville Lake was a great hangout with my boss who owned a
beautiful houseboat we were welcomed to use anytime . We had great friends and settled into a little church that made me feel right at home. On Sundays we would walk to church hand in hand through the little neighborhoods.We had great jobs, a nest egg, and loved living life married together. I often wondered how I had deserved such a blessed life from childhood until then…because of course I saw that point in my life as the of the rest of my life! I had done it. Found my soul mate – married him- and was living a dream. A fairytale. The kind you dream of when you are a little girl and in high school and right up until it comes true. Until I realized it was a fairytale. Taylor Swift said something about this wasn’t a fairytale and I wasn’t I princess. I believe Robert Frost said : All good things must go away… I never liked poetry. So let me start over ….
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